A Day In The Life of Dean Ambrose
by UltimateWarriorFan4Ever
Summary: Ever wonder how everyone's favorite Lunatic Fringe spends his 24 hours in a day. Well, it's nothing like you ever expect life to be. It's Dean at his crudest and weirdest! Expect a cameo from a cartoon character at the ending.


**"A Day In The Life of Dean Ambrose"**

 **Rated T for language  
**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own anything associated with WWE or any of its wrestlers. The World Wrestling Entertainment and its wrestlers are owned by its chairman, Vince McMahon. Since I felt bored, I figured out I'd do a day in the life of everyone's favorite Lunatic Fringe. BTW, I don't own the rights to Dean Ambrose. Only Dean Ambrose owns Dean Ambrose.**

* * *

 _ **7:00 a.m.**_

Dean Ambrose wakes up to his own alarm clock with his theme song built in.

"Wow, that was a nap if I've had one." Dean said after he yawned. "Hmmm, what's on TV, now?"

With the remote control in hand, Dean turned on the tube.

 _"Up next on TLC, an all-day marathon of '19 Kids and Counting'!"_ The announcer said.

"Eh, that show sucks ass..." Dean groaned.

And before that show could ever be on, Dean threw his remote control at the TV, breaking it into pieces.

"Well, that's the sixth TV so far." Dean groaned again as he got up.

 _ **8:00 a.m.**_

Dean Ambrose and his best friend Roman Reigns were driving along at a McDonalds, hoping to get some breakfast.

"Mmmmm, I can't wait to get my hands on those McMuffins." Roman said with a drooling jaw.

"I said that to Renee last night on our date." Dean smirked.

As they pulled up to the window, a McDonalds employee came out with their food: Two Egg McMuffins, Two large hash browns and two cups of grade-A orange juice.

"Here's your order." The employee nodded, giving the two men their food.

"Thanks." Dean and Roman said.

Suddenly, Dean managed to tap the employee in the shoulder. As she turned around, Dean let out a smirk and shouted:

"FIRE IN THE HOLE!"

And with that, Dean chucked a cup of orange juice at the lady and drove off really fast. Roman on the other hand, scowled at his friend.

"Really?" Roman groaned, "Did you have to do that again?"

"Eh, orange juice gives me gas." Dean shrugged.

 _ **8:30 a.m.**_

Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns were out at the fishing pond. They were sitting in their beach chairs, hoping to find the freshest fish possible. After minutes of waiting, Dean's fishing hook got a hold of something. That, of course, indicated that a fish was caught.

"Oh, I got this!" Dean exclaimed.

Instead of using his fishing hook, Dean Ambrose brought out a gun and shot the fish that was trapped to his hook. With a smirk, Dean Ambrose reeled the already dead fish out of the water and showed it to Roman.

"Dude, we sooooo got lunch." Roman smirked.

"Yeah, fishing's more fun with firearms." Dean smirked.

 _ **10:00 a.m.**_

Dean Ambrose was at Rent-A-Center, lifting up another big-screen TV to put on the check-out counter. It was 4D and had perfect picture and sound. An female employee, who was black and a little overweight, came up to Dean and smiled at him.

"Okay, that'll be $999, please." She replied.

"Sweet." Dean smirked. "Do you take credit cards?"

"Of course we do." The employee nodded.

And then, Dean gave out his credit card. Obviously enough, that wasn't Dean's credit card. It just happened to be Seth Rollins's credit card that Dean Ambrose stole in the first place.

"Oh, and have it ordered to Seth Rollins's house," Dean smirked before lying. "That's my name, you know."

 _ **11:45 a.m.**_

Dean Ambrose was at bingo with a couple of old people. One of the bingo callers grabbed a ball and called out the following letter and number:

"O-57."

"BINGO!" Dean shouted out.

"Congratulations, young man!" The bingo-caller replied. "Come and receive your prize!"

With a smirk, Dean Ambrose got out of his seat and went to the table to grab his prize (which was actually a microwave). But suddenly, Dean Ambrose pushed the prizes off the table and picked up the piece of wooden hardware himself for him to take.

"Um, sir, that's not a prize!" The bingo-caller exclaimed.

"Hey, I needed a new coffee table, okay?!" Dean replied as he exited with the table.

 _ **1:00 p.m.**_

Dean Ambrose was kicking back on his comfortable sofa with his feet kicked up on the coffee table. It seems that Dean was on one of his power naps.

"Now this is the life." Dean smirked.

Meanwhile, his pet cat, Mr. Deanie, got up on the left arm rest and slept as well. However, Dean ended up punching the cat off his armrest. It was clear he didn't like anything sleeping with him, except for women.

 _ **3:00 p.m.**_

After his 2-hour powernap, Dean Ambrose felt a little hungry. So he decided to go into his fridge to find something to eat.

Dean was a bit stupid to find out he forgot to do grocery shopping. There wasn't anything in the fridge that could keep him satisfied (mostly because some of his food was spoiled).

"Oh that's just crap." Dean groaned. "Where am I gonna eat now?"

Meanwhile, the Lunatic Fringe noticed a family of squirrels chattering in his backyard. Yearning for food, Dean Ambrose had an idea.

"Looks like hunting season came early." Dean smirked.

Suddenly, he brought out his gun, cocking it nice and tight. And then, he went outside to do a little squirrel shooting.

 _ **5:00 p.m.**_

Dean Ambrose was napping yet again. Possibly it was because of the grilled squirrels he consumed. And each dead squirrel came with five different flavors: Fried, oriental-flavored, barbecue-flavored, buffalo-flavored and ranch-flavored.

"Mmmmm, those were some tasty squirrels." Dean smirked. "Let's see what's on TV now."

With TV on his mind, Dean turned on the tube and heard the announcer's voice:

 _"Next up on Discovery Family, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic!"_

"Yeah, now we're talkin'!" Dean smirked. "That show's way awesome than crappy _19 Kids_. I wonder if there's a pony out there I can eat..."

 _ **7:30 p.m.**_

Dean Ambrose showed up at Renee Young's house with a bag of flowers at hand. He looked fancy and sharp-dressed to be exact. It seems that he was dressed up for a fancy date that he got planned for her.

After a gentle knock on the door, Renee opened it up, and out stood Dean on the doorway.

"Hey babe," Dean smirked. "I'm ready for our-"

"I'm cheating on you." Renee replied, cutting Ambrose off.

Suddenly, Dean went from happy-go-lucky to pissed off, just like that.

"Good, I burped in these flowers anyway." Dean said, throwing the flowers on the ground. "I figured you wouldn't want them!"

Dean then managed to walk away from her. Suddenly, Renee looked down at the flowers in shock.

"Hey, did you pick these out of my garden when I wasn't looking?!" Renee shouted far away at Dean.

 _ **9:00 p.m.**_

Dean Ambrose was walking out of the local park's bathroom at night. Zipping up his pants, he had a satisfied look on his face.

"Ahh, nothing feels good than a one-hour peefest." Dean smirked. "I gotta quit drinking too much at the bar."

As Dean was walking through the sidewalk like a zombie, a police car came up to him unexpectedly. As Dean heard the siren close to his ears, he looked at the car and started bitching.

"Aw, come on!" Dean cried out. "I had my pants on this time!"

 _ **10:30 p.m.**_

Dean Ambrose was locked in his jail cell, trapped in his powernaps again. He was resting in a old-dirty mattress while hearing the cold hard sounds of water dripping down to the floor. But on the other hand, he felt relaxed and happy to sleep on the mattress himself.

"Well, at least I won't have to sleep with the cat this time." Ambrose smirked.

As he was sleeping, he heard a strange little voice speak close to him.

"Hey, Dean."

Dean opened up his eyes to see a fat talking pink starfish named Patrick sitting next to him. Shocked that he could talk, Dean was uttered speechless.

"What are you in for?" Patrick spoke to him.

Trying to think that this wasn't a dream, Ambrose rubbed his eyes. To his shock, he was actually talking to a fat starfish that came to life. It almost looked like live-action to the Lunatic Fringe. Realizing this right now, he shook his head off and went back to his nap.

"Okay, I really gotta quit drinking so much before bed..." Dean nodded to himself.

* * *

 **Well, that's a day in the life of Dean Ambrose, ladies and gentleman. I bet no one saw Patrick from "SpongeBob SquarePants" coming at the end. Maybe Dean should lay off the pot and beer next time. I hope that the rest of you enjoyed it as much as I did.**

 **Feedbacks are welcome here! Until next time, this is UltimateWarriorFan4Ever signing off!**


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